Is it time to quit your job?

office-620823_1920Figuring out when to move on from a job may be one of the hardest decisions you will make in life. Too often people ignore the signs that they may need a new job because they are afraid of change. In some situations you may know in your heart that you are not happy at your job but you’re not sure when it might be the right time to change jobs.

Don’t get in the cycle of living your life on autopilot; your life is much more valuable than that. At Double C Coaching we understand what it’s like feeling dissatisfied in a job and not being sure what steps to take. If you find yourself stuck in a rut and not satisfied at work, here are a few signs that you may need a new job:

You dread going to work – If you find yourself afraid of stepping into the office for fear of what might happen, chances are it may be time to change jobs. Now bear in mind that every job comes with its fair amount of stress, that’s not completely unavoidable. However if the thought of going to work fills you with fear and you constantly obsess about what can go wrong, you may not be in the best situation.

This stress can manifest itself emotionally and physically and can start to affect other areas of your life. Take an honest look at your work situation and make the decisions to move on before it gets too late.

You career goals no longer align with the company – Remember that whichever position you are in, you are providing a service in exchange for monetary compensation. If you find that the skills or services you are providing no longer have a meaningful purpose to you, then it may be time to leave your job.
Companies are dynamic and constantly changing, that means that as you stay with the company you are exposed to other areas where you can use different skills, which can be beneficial to your career growth. However if you find yourself getting stuck in positions that do not make use of your best skills or do not expose you to areas that you are passionate about then it may be time to move on from the job.

Before moving on it is always best to discuss these concerns with your superior or look for other roles in the company that might be better suited to you, however if all else fails you should quit your job.
You are not valued in your workplace – If you’ve ever broken up with someone chances are you know what it’s like to feel unappreciated; the same can be said of a company. If for whatever reason you feel as though the company is undervaluing you, you may want to ask yourself if you should quit your job.
There are several warning signs that the company could be undervaluing you: like passing you up for a promotion, or a boss who is constantly disrespectful, or forcing you to work more hours but with no additional pay.

As with any situation like this it can be hard to cut the cord. Sometimes it’s easier to take the abuse than demand what you truly deserve. Keep in mind that you do want to make an attempt at rectifying the situation before you part ties with the company.

Whatever the case don’t allow any company to feel comfortable treating you in a lesser way than you deserve, that is a clear sign that it is time to change jobs.

Unstable work environment – With the economy as it is today many companies have faced downsizing and increased layoffs which can make the work environment very unpredictable.

Many times upper level management won’t divulge the true state of the company for fear of causing employees to worry. However if you notice that employees have been heading out consistently or there is an inconsistent leadership pattern at the company it may be time to move on.

Don’t wait until it’s too late to get your feet back in the job market. If the situation gets so bad that you feel unable to do your work efficiently then that should be a major sign that it’s time to leave your job.

You’re not challenged – If you feel like you are no longer challenged by your work, or the job is not what you expected it to be, then consider whether you might need to leave.

If you have been actively looking for more project in your company but find that there are limited opportunities for advancement or growth this could be a sign that your skills may not be best utilised at your current company.

While I do think it’s important to first discuss the concern with your manager don’t feel pressured to stay in a position where you are no longer growing or learning.

In an ideal world it would be simple to just leave your job and find another one; however that’s hardly the case in this economic climate. Before leaving any job you must spend the time to reflect on what exactly you need from your job and take steps to make changes in your current situation.
Ideally every 6 months you should reassess whether the career path you are on is in line with your goals. Your first instinct should not be to leave once you realise a disconnect. First try to take steps to remediate the situation at your current job. If you then realise that it’s just not a good fit for you then be willing to be honest with yourself and make a change. It can be hard to make the decision to quit your job and survive in the tough market.

Double C Coaching can help you clarify your career goals and provide you with the resources to navigate the ever-changing job market. We can help you figure out when it is the right time to leave your job and help you create a transition plan to get you on a path to success. Don’t hesitate to reach out to us to discuss your career needs.

‘More Confidence’ What Does It Really Mean?

‘More Confidence’ What Does It Really Mean?

CB009 - ‘More Confidence’ What Does It Really Mean?

I say to you “What is it you want?”, you know, “Do you want more confidence?”

And you say “Yes!”

I say “More confidence? What does that mean to you?”

“Oh, I don’t know, I just want more confidence.”

So let’s assume that I you know, change the subject now and say, we’re walking down the road and you’ve just told me you want more money and I spot on the floor a penny and I say “There you are, pick that penny up.”

And you say “Ach, it’s not enough, it’s too small it’s not worth the effort.”

I say “You wanted more money and now there’s a penny on the floor you don’t want it. Why?”

You say “It’s not enough.”

“It’s more than you had before, it’s one penny more, so why is it you don’t want it?”

And it’s the same with your confidence, if you’re not specific about where you want to be and when you want to be confident, how you want to feel in that situation then it’s very difficult for you to achieve anything because you don’t have a goal.

Listen to the podcast to find out how to get specific and get the confidence help you want.

Or:

Click To Read Show Transcript Now

More Confidence - what Does It really Mean?

Hi there, it’s Stuart again with another exciting episode of Confidence Bytes.

Now, as I’m recording this episode the Olympic Games has just come to a close and whenever I see a big sports event like the Olympic Games or one of the other major events around the world I always think about the player who has a coach, in fact all the players have coaches, but I think about the coaches, the behind the scenes support that these players have.

And this is one of the primary reasons that they’re able to become the superstars that they are, and it’s not limited to players either, if you think about pop stars if you think about, erm, erm, movie stars, if you think about actors in general. The people who do the best are the guys who’ve got the support behind them and why should it be any different with you and your confidence?

Just think about it for a moment…

We all need support. Now when we were younger, possibly we had support from our parents. But sometimes that support may be a little tainted.

You know, I’ve spoken to you about the situation where a father has a child and he plans that this child is going to be ‘this’ when he grows older or when she grows older and he’s adamant that this is going to happen because his child is going to be ‘this’ person. So his support might be a little tainted to his dream and not your dream.

So this is why I have to be a little bit sort of, erm, er, careful with the support we get from our parents. Yes, generally it’s very good, but there are times when it’s a little bit biased one way or the other.

So, let me give you an example of how a good coach can make you perform more powerfully, more strongly than you ever thought possible. And this comes from a video I watched on YouTube and honestly I can’t remember for the life of me the name of the video or whether it was from a movie or what it was about but it’s an American football player and the coach was talking to the team and they were sort of, you know, a good team but they were, you know, down on their luck sort of thing, in the, erm, erm erm, league or whatever it was they were playing in.

And one of the guys, he’s a really big strong, strapping guy. He’s obviously one of the star players, he’s basically saying “What’s the point? We’re beaten anyway. What’s the point?”
And the coach took him to task, he said “OK I want you to, to show me something. I want you to show me how big and strong you really are.” or words to that effect.

“I want you to get down in a crab position on the grass and I want you to be blindfolded and I want you to start walking in the crab position… but to make it harder, let’s put somebody on your back.”

And he took one of the other players and he asked them to sit on his back.

So imagine this guy, you know, big strong guy, he’s in a crab position and he’s got a player on his back and he’s blindfolded and the coach was next to him and said “OK, now start walking forward.”

So the guy starts walking forward a little bit. Obviously it’s difficult you know (laughs) just walking in a crab blindfolded is not too easy but with a full grown guy on your back is even worse.

So this guy starts walking forward and the coach is encouraging him “Go on, just one more step, a bit further.”

And the guy, the players says “No, it’s hurting, I can’t go any further.”

And to cut a long story short, the coach was on his hands and knees shouting encouragement to this player.

The guy was saying “No, I can’t go any further!”

And the guy says, coach says, “You’re nearly there, just one more step, just one more step!” And he kept doing this, and he kept egging his player on, he kept egging the player on… and eventually the coach says “Right, that’s it, you’re finished now. Take off your blindfold.”

And this guy collapsed on the floor groaning, you know (laughs) because he’s just been through one heck of a task.

He took off his blindfold and he turned round and he looked how far he’d come… He had walked, or crawled the whole length of the football field with another guy on his back.

And he was stunned! He was totally, totally stunned.

And the coach said to him “OK, now do you see what you can do if you really want to?”

And just think about that…

He crawled, with a full grown man on his back, the whole length of his football field and because the coach was there by his side encouraging him on and supporting him, with him all the way he did something that he would have never believed achievable.

So what about you?

What is it that you think you can’t achieve, what is it you want from your life that you think is too difficult? Who is on your side? Who is rooting for you? Who’s on the floor with you and just giving you encouragement all that time?

Do you have someone like that?

Well, if you don’t, I su… you know, I respectfully suggest that you find somebody who’s going to be there for you, to help you get the confidence, to help you get the success that you are probably looking for.

Now, earlier I spoke about family and said that you have to be a little bit careful about family, you also have to be careful about others who may have a hidden agenda.

You know, friends may have a hidden agenda, I’ve spoken about this before, family may have a hidden agenda. You need someone who has got no skin in the game for themselves, they just want the best for you whatever that is. Yes, they can give you advice but they should never, ever stop you from going and achieving your dreams.

You need someone who’s impartial, someone who’s going to give you honest, open advice and then let you make the decision because it’s your decision and if you want to make a mistake or you want to do something it’s also your decision because that’s what you need to do learn whatever lessons.

Now obviously, you know, if you’re going to do something totally stupid and try and kill yourself then the coach is going to be a little bit sort of hesitant, you know, and not encourage you to do that. But you know what I’m talking about. I’m talking about somebody who doesn’t want something for themselves, they don’t want your success for themselves…

And that’s, that’s happened with, erm, ahhh, what’s his, err… one of the major tennis players a few years ago was a girl and her father was pushing her for success so that he could bask in the glory. And it happens in quite a few sports fields and, you know, not only sports.

So, you want someone who is there independently for you. It’s about you, it’s about you finding the support you need.

Now, let’s just talk about confidence in general and I say to you, just, let’s, let’s assume we’re having a conversation, I say to you “What is it you want?”, you know, “Do you want more confidence?”

And you say “Yes!”

I say “More confidence? What does that mean to you?”

“Oh, I don’t know, I just want more confidence.”

So let’s assume that I you know, change the subject now and say, we’re walking down the road and you’ve just told me you want more money and I spot on the floor a penny and I say “There you are, pick that penny up.”

And you say “Ach, it’s not enough, it’s too small it’s not worth the effort.”

I say “You wanted more money and now there’s a penny on the floor you don’t want it. Why?”

You say “It’s not enough.”

“It’s more than you had before, it’s one penny more, so why is it you don’t want it?”

And it’s the same with your confidence, if you’re not specific about where you want to be and when you want to be confident, how you want to feel in that situation then it’s very difficult for you to achieve anything because you don’t have a goal.

Okay? You need goals, but you need to have steps, you know, you could say “My goal is to, er, be the president of the United States.” But you’ve go no steps along the way, you’ve got nothing you can start doing right away so you’re unlikely to achieve that goal.

So let’s say you want more confidence ok? When, when do you want to feel more confident? What situation? What times?

Let’s go down into deeper and deeper specifics, let’s talk about, you know, the exact time. The exact situation. Is it in a meeting?

Is it just, erm, walking into a, a, a, you know, a new restaurant and you’re not share, you know, you’re feeling a bit sort of um, edgy because you’re not, erm, sure of the layout and you’re not sure who to go to. What is the situation you want more confidence?

And there could be more than one, it doesn’t matter, write them down, get a piece of paper, write all of them down. Just write, write, write, when you feel you have a lack of confidence. And don’t allow yourself to be swayed by “I just don’t have confidence. I just want more confidence.”

Let’s get specific. Let’s look at one thing, let’s look at one thing and then we work on that, we get the confidence in that situation and you know what happens?

Because you’ve been successful in that situation, other situations you’ll start emulating that success and your confidence issue will start to lessen. So get specific, decide when you want to do it. And look at your list, write the list, say “Ok, what is the one situation I’m going to work on now? What is the most important to me or the most pressing for me in, in, you know, where I am in my life now?”

And it could be that you’re in a, you know, you’re in a company and you have to give a presentation and you don’t have the confidence for your presentation. You’re so scared, you know, that you’re going to get on stage, you’re going to freeze, you know, and all these things so that is your most pressing situation. OK?

Fix that and guess what? All the others will start to lessen because now you’ve fixed a major, major, major thing like that.

So, get your list, start writing down and say “OK, I want more confidence in that situation…”

STOP!

What does ‘more confidence in that situation’ really mean to you?

Think about it.
Does it mean that I’ll be able to talk to more people?

Does it mean that I’ll be able to get my point of view across?

Be as specific, drill down okay? Drill down into the details of what being more confident in that situation means.

Once you’ve done that you need your paper, you start writing down all the things that being more confident in that situation means. And then you look at that and you say - “Okay, what is the smallest thing I can do right this moment to start me being that more confident person?”

And you have your goal, you can see in your ey, minds eye, what this more confident person looks like.

It could be the way they stand, so if it’s the way they stand - what can you do right now to practice your standing in a more confident way? Must you do your ‘Superman pose’ or your ‘Wonder Woman pose’? Must you do your ‘Yeeessss, I’m good’ or must you do any of those things? Because they will start you on that pathway.

And when you’ve done that first thing you look at your list again, what’s the next thing, what’s the next bit? As you’re seeing it as your successes ok, because you’re ticking off… “I’ve done that! Now I’m feeling much better, I’ve got a good posture, now I need to go and practice somewhere, let me go to the supermarket, let me go out here. Let me just practice this, this proud bearing this, this, this better pose…” or whatever it is and then you start doing these things and you make them your life, you make them your habits.

OK?

Because confidence is a habit. You know that.

Confidence is a habit, we’ve spoken about it many times, so you make the good confidence habits, OK?

So, let me just recap, quickly, where we are.

We spoke about a coach and we spoke about the need to have an impartial coach who is there for you.

We spoke about the need to have clear goals with regard to your confidence and within those goals, there could be many, many, situations, but you pick the one that is the most pressing in your life at this moment. If you’re a young, you know, a little bit younger and you don’t have a boyfriend or a girlfriend and you’re too tongue tied to speak to anybody that could be your most pressing goal.

If you need an interview with your boss about a promotion but you’re too scared to make the time, you know, to book a time to have this interview, that could be your most pressing goal.

So write it down and then start working and look for the smallest thing you can do right now.

Let’s take the interview - “What do I need for the interview if I want to be promoted?”

I need to know why I’m worthy, what are all my good points, what have I brought to the company? I need to start preparing my case and I also need to know where I want to be promoted to and how much money I want.

If I go there and I don’t know these things then, you know, I’m like, I’m likely to get nothing. You know, it’s, it’s the same situation if you go for, you’re brand new, if you go for a job, you haven’t got a job and they say “Ok, how much do you want paying?”

“Errm, it doesn’t matter.”

“Ok, if I pay you $50 a month is that okay?”

“No! No, that’s not ok.”

“But you just told me it didn’t matter.”

“You haven’t bothered to do you homework, it shows me that you’re not really serious…”

So you need to get prepared.

Ok, so think about it ok? Think about those things… write down where, when you want to be more confident. What is the situation? How do you feel right now in those situations? Where, what or how do you want to feel?

OK?

Are there people that you want to emulate?

If so, make a note of them. Do some research, look around, see what you can see and then start identifying the steps that you need to take to get there.

Pick the smallest step. Get it done. Be grateful, congratulate yourself for that success and then move on to the next smallest one and the next smallest one and before you know it your problems will be gone. Your issues will be gone, your confidence will be rising all the time because you’re seeing progress, you’re seeing success.

And success breeds success.

Okay, that’s quite a long diatribe, I’ve not given you much time to think, (chuckles) I’m sorry about that but I get carried away sometimes. But what I suggest is listen again and listen again, get your paper out, take notes look at the transcript that I’m going to put with the video and with the audio.

Look at it, listen to it, read it and then go away and do the steps. And if you want to talk to me you know how to get hold of me, you just go to my website doubleccoaching.com and then you’ll see ‘contact’. Hit ‘contact’ and send me the message and we can communicate from there.

And don’t forget to tweet me if you want, I love getting tweets from you.

Speak to you soon,

Ciao.

Job Interview Advice

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Don’t make these interview mistakes!

Congratulations! You’ve finally received that call or email about the job you’ve been waiting on for a while. Your slot has been secured for an interview. Thrilling right? Now all you need to do is ace that interview and change your unemployment status to employed.

Yes! It is absolutely doable! The secret to this you wonder? You need to differentiate yourself from other interviewees. And how will you do that? Simple! All you need to know are the most common interview mistakes people make in interviews and avoid them. Knowing exactly what not to do in an interview is vital.

Common Interview Mistakes

Being unprepared

It is very easy for an interviewer to know whether you are prepared for the interview or not. Being unprepared is one of the many interview mistakes you could make. Unfortunately, it is one of the most common interview mistakes most interviewees make.

Lack of preparation has a way of locking you out of the job offer. Some companies may call you for an interview at the last minute, inconvenient perhaps, but it’s still no excuse to go to your interview unprepared.

Being irritated or angry

Getting irritated and angry is a prime example of what not to do in an interview. If you lose your temper or become irritated easily, there’s a good chance that your interviewer could immediately disqualify you.

Even if you have years of experience and excellent qualifications, if you cannot control your temper, how do you expect to work with others? How will you handle pressure? What about the clients? 

Talking too much

Wondering what not to do in an interview? Avoid overwhelming the interviewer with unnecessary details about yourself. Listen carefully to the questions asked and give precise answers. Simplify your answers and only expound when asked to.  To avoid this most common interview mistake, remember you’re not talking to your peers but to your possible future employer. Save the chit chat for your friends, it’s in the best interest of all parties.

Poor body language

Your body is able to convey what your mind is thinking. See why you need coaching? You need to know what your interviewer is deducing from your body language. From doubting yourself leading to answering questions with a minimal to no confidence level, to holding zero eye contact, giving a weak hand shake and not smiling.

Poor body language is an interview mistake you can overcome. Coaching will definitely hasten your learning process on what you shouldn’t do in an interview when it comes to body language. Where is the best place for coaching? Stuart from Double C coaching is simply your to go to place.

Asking the wrong questions

Questions are good, but what not to do in an interview? Ask the wrong questions! This is a major setback for you and a complete turn off for the interviewer. How will you know what the right questions are? Stuart from Double C coaching is your solution. As a business woman, you cannot afford to ask the wrong kind of questions.

Advice from Successful Career Women

We asked successful career women for their advice, here’s what they had to say:

Add Value

The interviewer is looking for you to demonstrate how you can add value to the company… Have you thought about that? And whilst you’re doing so think about why you are better than all the other candidates.

Don’t Overdress or underdress

While your in-person interview is your first opportunity to put your best foot forward, wearing a three piece suit to a labor-intensive job will make you look more unprepared. The same goes for wearing jeans and a button-up shirt for an office job. Your attire should be one step above the standard the company has established.

Don’t complain about your last job, boss, coworkers

Yes, the interviewer is going to ask you why you left your last job. Your answer is going to tell a lot about you as an employee and coworker. If you spend the next five minutes telling them about how much your boss annoyed you or how politics prevented you from succeeding, you’re going to leave a very negative impression. ‘Why you left your last job’ is a very common question, and it may be true that your last job was a nightmare, but you can’t say that. The world is a very small place, especially today with the all-reaching social media, and for all you know your last boss could be best friends with your interviewer. Plan ahead how you are going to answer this question.

Leslie Ramey - Vet & Pet Jobs

Phone and Video Interviews

Today, many interviews occur over the phone or video chat. These interviews involve a whole separate set of rules for etiquette and professionalism. As an interview facilitator for StaffGeek’s clients, I often hear candidates struggle with making a virtual connection.

On the phone, it should be your goal to let the other person speak as much as possible. You want to hear as much about the position as possible while refraining from overwhelming your interviewer.

Never say something to fill the silence. If you have finished a thought, let a few seconds of silence alert the other party rather than rambling on.

When the interviewer pauses, resist the inclination to cut in with “yes”, “yup”, “mmhmm”, “ok”, etc. You may not realize, but the comment takes a moment to cross the connection and often interrupts the beginning of their next point.

Finally, whether on the phone or video chat, conduct the interview in an appropriate setting. Make sure you have a good connection and avoid background noise. Try standing and walking around to sound energised and never lay down as it can be heard in the flattened tone of your voice.

Katie Hansen with StaffGeek

Coaching

You deserve to get your dream job. Yes you do! To kickstart your career, coaching is vital. You need coaching on all interview mistakes and tactics to impress your interviewer. Having the required knowledge or years of experience is not enough in an interview.

Worry not! Stuart from Double C coaching can easily coach you! Remember, when it comes to interviews, you only have one shot to prove yourself – so make it count!

Conclusion

To be successful, your career must be on track and on point. How? Stuart from Double C coaching will help to get you there.

Planning Your Confidence Building Strategy

Planning Your Confidence Building Strategy

CB008 - Planning Your Confidence Building Strategy

Do you have a confidence building strategy? Well now is the time to fix that.

You want to be more confident, but when is that, where is that and how do you want to feel? You see ‘being more’ confident doesn’t mean so much unless you start qualifying these different aspects.

So, from today, you will develop a deeper understanding of exactly what ‘being more confident’ means to you. You’ll start to understand the feelings and behaviours you want to develop as a more confident ‘you’ and build a plan to make it happen.

If you want to download the transcript for later perusal you may download it at the link directly below

And do let me know what tips you want me to share on forthcoming shows. You can reach me at: https://www.doubleccoaching.com/Contact.html

Or:

Click To Read Show Transcript Now

CB008 - Planning Your Confidence Building Strategy
Hi there, welcome back to another exciting episode of Confidence Bytes. And I’m Stuart, and I’m going to be your host today.
Now, today’s show is all about a confidence strategy. I mean, it’s all right saying “I want to be more confident” but confident where? Confident when?
How is it you feel now and how do you want to feel? Well this is what we’re going to be looking at today.
So the first thing I want you to do, is, I want you to think about - when is it you want to be more confident, what situations?
Now, it could in a meeting at work, it could be when meeting new people, it could be, erm, when you get the phone... on the phone to make a sales call, it could be anything like that.
And I want you to take a piece of paper and I want you to write down all the times, all the places you want to be more confident.
Now pick from that list the most important one for you to work on today okay, you know, you, very often we find that when we work on the most important thing all the other things fall away. So, look at the list, choose one and pick that.
Now let’s assume you’ve chosen, you want to be more confident in meetings. Well, look at it and say how is it I feel when I’m in a meeting, when I say I’m not confident?
What am I feeling? What am I thinking?
Write this down and why is it I feel that way and what is making me feel that way?
Now, you know, consider those for a while and look at how you want to feel in that meeting. It’s all right saying “I want to be more confident in the meeting.” but what does that really mean?
And you need to, to write down as much detail as possible of what this confident person, this new confident you, in the meeting, is going to look like, is going to feel like, is going to sound like, what is she going to do?
How is she going to appear to others?
Because once you’ve got this information then you can plan a strategy about how you’re going to achieve that.
I mean, think about it, when you’re in this meeting what are you feeling that makes you feel you have a lack of confidence?
Write that down.
What are you not feeling at that time?
Write that down, and be specific here. It’s not “Oh, I’m just feeling yergh.” What is it you are actually feeling?
Are you feeling scared? Are you feel that other people don’t respect you?
Are you feeling that, you know, “I’ve so much to say but I just can’t get it out... and every time I try to speak somebody steps over me”?
So I want you to get as specific as possible and write down as much detail as possible because once you have this specificity then you can start looking and say “Ok, what is it I can do right now to start changing that?”
Now, if you take the meeting scenario, why is it that you might be feeling tongue tied? Is it because you’re scared of your co-workers?
Is it because you’re just aaah, have this sort of lack of confidence as a general thing and the demeanour is very bad?
Or, you know, could you change that by just opening your space a little bit, opening yourself up?
Could you change that by doing the power pose beforehand, you know, could you just claim a bit more space in the meeting and ‘say’ “this is my space”?
Think about what you can do to give yourself that change of behaviour...
And here’s a question for you...
Are you really ready to become this new person? Because it’s a new identity and maybe you’ve been using the old identity as a shield. So are you ready to become this person?
Yes?
Great! Go away... “Yeeesss” do your power pose, do all these things, and you can do these things before the meeting.
If you remember some of the previous things, the ‘I Am Good Sheet’, the ‘My Success’ and ‘All The things I’ve Learned’ and the ‘Superwoman Pose’ or the ‘Superman Pose’ and the ‘Power Pose’ and the ‘Smile’, you can go and look at these.
And you can do these before your meeting, you can just quickly go to the ladies room or the gents. And you can just do the ‘Power Pose’ for a few minutes and then you’ll feel that energy coming through you. You can use your circle of influence we spoke about before, you know, to step into as you into the meeting room.
And then you sit there and you claim your space, you put your shoulders back, you open your chest up a little bit and keep your head nicely and you just stay proud.
Now you have claimed your, erm, space in this meeting. You have signalled to everybody that you’re a force to be reckoned with and, you know, here’s the other thing about the meeting - you need to prepare. OK. Prepare...
What is the meeting about?
Find as much information...
What do you think Jo or John or Mary or Peter or the boss or whoever is going to say in this meeting? OK?. Anticipate them, get answers ready, get as much knowledge as possible because that will help you be more confident.
And when it’s your turn to speak - speak, don’t mumble, don’t push your head down, put your head up, look directly at whoever it is you need to look at and say, calmly, clearly what it is you have to say.
And say it slowly.
And if somebody interrupts, stop them: “Excuse me. I haven’t finished speaking yet.” or something along those lines.
Be firm, be polite and people will start to take notice.
So, you can only do this if you know what it is you want to feel like in this situation, whether it’s the meeting or something else.
And, you know, here’s another little tip. Who do you know who’s a public figure who has that attribute? What is it about them?
You can write that down as well.
So, maybe we’re talking about meetings, who’s the most confident in meetings in your company? Who’s the most confident person you’ve seen walking down the street or you’ve seen pictures of or whatever?
What is it about that person? “What attributes have they got which I can borrow?”
And then you start looking and you start gathering and it could be that this person, John, or this film star here has certain, different attributes but you want both of them. So you take this one from ‘that one’ and that one from ‘that one’ and something else from another person and you start modelling OK. We’re not trying to make you be that person, we’re just trying to model.
And you know, here’s an interesting story. there was, er, er, I can’t remember the guy’s name, I think it was ‘Think and Grow Rich’, but he, he had a private mastermind, in his mind just before he went to bed. He spent an hour with these people he’d selected. People like George Washington, people like Abraham Lincoln, other people, people who had attributes he admired.
And he started off every night, he said “Good evening, de, de, de...” Good evening to this person, good evening to that person and then he said to them “You have this attribute which I want to borrow.” And over the course of time, he did this regularly as I say, every night, he took this one from that person and this one from that person and that one from that person and he had all these attributes within himself so he became a much better, much more powerful, much more confident person because of this.
So these are things that you can do...
Think about it OK?
“How do I feel in this situation?”
“What am I thinking?”
“What is my body doing?”
Make as many notes as, detailed notes as possible...
“What am I not feeling?”
“What is my body not doing?”
Find out. Write them down and then look at it and say:
“How is it I want to feel in this situation?”
“How do I want my body to look?”
“How do I want people to look at me?”
“How do I want them to hear me?”
If it’s a speaking situation - “How do I sound?”
“Do I sound confident?”
“Have I got my head down so I’m all muffled?”
“Am I looking directly at the people?”
All these things... And then write down how you want to feel.
Now, you’ve got all this, these notes you’ve got the attributes, from the different people, you want to borrow, you’ve got your body posture you want to change, all theses things. Look at it and say “What is the smallest thing, the smallest thing I can do right now to start getting me to be this new person... And am I ready to be this new person?”
I mean, if you are the type of person, sorry, if you are, you know, you want to become this more confident person in meetings maybe that will give you more responsibility, and you don’t have the time at work.
Are you ready to accept that responsibility?
Is it something you can handle because your workload is too much?
Because maybe, maybe, this is one of the hidden secrets why you don’t want to be noticed because you’ve got so much work, you’ve got so much pressure on you that you don’t want more.
So you’ve got to think about that as well - “Am I ready to be this person?”, “Can I accept this new identity which I am developing?”
If so, great!
If not, you need to look at that part first.
If you have too much work, if you’re feeling overloaded, maybe it’s time to speak to your boss, your manager or somebody along those lines and see whether they can, you know, lighten the load a little.
Now, there’s so many different ways people want to be more confident. I mean, you see some people, they’re very confident in one thing but in another thing they’re hesitant.
So by identifying, and you may have half a dozen or you may have more, or you may have fewer areas, it doesn’t matter. By identifying the area you can choose the one that is most important to you right now and, as I say, if you fix that, then it’s quite likely a lot of the other ones will fall away.
And here’s another thing, as I say, preparation for a meeting, preparation for a speech, preparation for a sales call, preparation for, you know, just anything is very important.
You have to prepare.
And not only the knowledge, not only the content, if you’ve got a phone call, an important phone call, you have to prepare ‘you’. Can you speak clearly? Is your mouth dry? Do you have a cough, do you have a tickle in your throat?
What about how you’re going to stand?
Are you going to sit on the desk slumped over trying to make this call? Are you going to sit back or are you going to stand for the phone call?
You need to prepare yourself so that you are giving the best and obviously be, beforehand you do your power pose, you do your, you know, ‘Yeees’, your victory salute, you get your ‘I Am Good Sheet’ and things and just remember all the successes you’ve had in the past so you can have more successes.
So this is art of your preparation, the mental preparation and then there’s the written preparation, all the notes you need to do, all the knowledge, the content you have to get, this alone will give you the confidence that you need.
And then you know how you want to feel, you know how you want to come across, how you want to react and then you can plan what you need to do to make that happen.
So, there’s quite a lot there, I suggest you go back you listen again and then you take your paper and you make notes. Think about specifically “How is it I feel now in this situation...” or before that, “What is the situation, what specifically is the situation?”
“How do I feel now?”
“How do I want to feel?”
“What am I not feeling now”
What is it that I need to feel?” Okay.
“How can I prepare myself better?”
If it’s a meeting, claim your space. What about giving a speech? This is a whole new ball game,
“What is it I need to do?”
“Who do I want to emulate?” “How do I want to come across?”
And remember, practice, practice, practice - get as much information as you can and then practice. If it’s giving a speech, do it in front of the mirror, get yourself a computer and get some screen recording software and give it in front of there or just take your phone and put it on somewhere, a mantlepiece or something so that it can record you.
And then give it to the phone. Practice these things then you can see where the errors are, you can see where you didn’t come across as you intended because sometimes you don’t see when you’re, when you’re talking. And then you can correct them, you can work on correcting them.
Maybe your stance - “What do I have to do to get my stance good?” “Do I need to do the power pose?”
“How can I make that look so ob... you know, so unobvious - it’s not a proper word, you know, unobvious but you know what I mean...How can I make it look more natural and still be that confident, super strong person?”
So, go away, do your homework and don’t forget you can eml, email me at: stuart at doubleccoaching.com or go to the website https://www.doubleccoaching.com/ Contact.html and you’ll find a contact form.
Either way I will respond to you, and when you do email me tell me what are the tips that you want me to give you, because I love to help you. So, thank you for watching, I’ll speak to you next time. Go a way and BEEE more confident!
OKAY? Bye, bye.

Our Favourite Confidence Quotes

Our Favourite Confidence Quotes

Our Favourite Confidence Quotes

Our Favourite Confidence Quotes

For anyone who wishes to keep themselves in a prime mental mood, the words of
others can be powerful inspiration.

It always helps when we have words of wisdom that we can recall over the years.
When the going gets tough or we can’t find a solution/answer to our problems, it
always helps to have a quote. After all, quotes that inspire us can give us confidence,
and confidence is absolutely key to any success.

Without having belief in your skills or your talents, how will you ever become the
person that you wish to be?

To help make sure you can truly believe in yourself and feel completely at home with
who you are, here are some great confidence quotes that you can learn from.
Each of these can – and should – be stored in your mental library. They can all be
used at times of negativity or struggle to remind yourself of the power of confidence!

Confidence Quotes

“In order to be irreplaceable one must always be different.” - Coco Chanel

This is a quote that lets us know how important it is to be unique. People don’t want
to work with those who offer generic services and banal solutions. There is no reason
to be limited in your potential or your future success because by going in a different
direction you allow yourself to innovate and be different.

Confidence Quotes

“Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.” - Dr. Benjamin Spock

It’s very easy to convince ourselves that we know far less than we think. When we
look at our own successes and talents it’s easy to be negative when we compare
ourselves to the greats. But when you take away that veneer of self-deprecation, it’s
usually quite easy to see the vast quality – and quantity – of your own skills when you
take a less negative look.

“Always remember you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” - Christopher Robin

One of the easiest things that you can do in your life is look down on yourself. We always find it easy to see ourselves as less than we are, through fear of “overconfidence”. Well, this is an equally dangerous route to take; things are never quite as bad as you may make out!

“Confidence… thrives on honesty, on honour, on the sacredness of obligations,
on faithful protection and on unselfish performance. Without them it cannot
live.” - Franklin D. Roosevelt

This quote is an especially powerful one; we cannot be confident when we don’t trust
ourselves. If you spend all of your time being dishonest and making up false
scenarios, then you’ll never feel truly confident as you are never being yourself.
This is the challenge and the balancing act of life – and many of us find it very hard to
adjust to. However, it’s by no means impossible.
Keep the quotes above as an indicator of what can change in your life when you
look to imbue yourself with more confidence.

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